The Strength of Mothering

By Heather Bright

Before I became a mother, 3:00 a.m. was a time that I knew existed, but I’d never been awake to experience. After my first child was born, I realized there really are 24 hours in a day, and I became familiar with each passing minute during the dark hours of the night while feeding and diapering my tiny newborn. Somehow, mothers are granted an equal measure of joy and challenges; this juxtaposition creates an opportunity for us to not only raise the next generation, but also realize our potential as human beings. Mothering opens our eyes to the best and weakest parts of who we are, allowing a journey that is beautiful in spite of its potential pain.

Recently, I read a quote by Linda Wooten that rang true: “Being a mother is learning about strengths you didn’t know you had and dealing with fears you never knew existed.”

I was only 22 when my first child was born. Even though our son was a welcomed and wanted addition to my husband’s and my life, there wasn’t a book or article that prepared me for the uncertainty of bringing home a tiny six-pound human. The books made it sound methodical, as if there was a one-size-fits-all approach to surviving the first year. The books didn’t mention that I would question everything. The fears and worries were probably too many to list, but far enough in the past that I don’t remember now. Eventually, those fears were exchanged for relief that we made it through his early childhood years.

As I look back on those early years, my insecurities were changed to confidence after time and experience. Motherhood produces a mental and emotional strength that isn’t displayed until practiced. Perhaps it was always there, just untapped. It takes a special strength to comfort your child when they experience undeserved pain due to loss or ridicule. As mothers, we wish to protect our little (and big) ones from the hurt they will inevitably encounter. However, what if we see such experiences as a blessing and not a curse? I have learned that if I could shield my children from all hurt and discomfort, they would never learn how to properly process pain or manage their emotions. In the safety of Mom, they can navigate all that life brings their way. I never knew I had the strength to be that kind of guide, but it was there.

Raising children is as much a training opportunity for parents as it is for children. I feel like I am the one who has learned the most while I have been the teacher. My growth has come through the challenging days that require both grit and grace. If you were to look through the photos on my phone, you would find countless happy and fun memories. There are smiles with sweet stories to tell. You and I don’t chronicle the challenges, but they inevitably shape us into who we really are.

Children ask hard questions with impossible answers, but mothers find the words to say. Children react with unfiltered words and emotions, but mothers love them anyway. This is the strength that we celebrate this month. Along with strength, we find resilience, courage and endurance. Happy Mother’s Day to all of the strong women who make a difference every day.

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The YMCA of Greater Dayton is proud to serve the hard working mothers in our communities through Child Care, Summer Programs, Child Watch, and much more!